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the ashes...
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tugger
24-Nov-06, 13:48

the ashes...
there will probably only be interest shown by mozz, leo and myself, but even still, we need a thread where we can discuss how crap england are doing and the usual cricket banter...

so, after test 1 day 2, the scores are
1st innings...
aus 609-9 dec
eng 53-3

play to resume shortly...

for those who don't really understand cricket scores, i'll put that in plain english... australia are kicking our arses... it's still early, there's three days left and australia have to get us all out twice if they are to win, but it's already beyond england for the win... i think it's going to come down to dirty tactics in the second innings... england should not go for runs, but play the boring and unentertaining test game, where they defend the stumps instead of whack the ball... crap to watch, but sometimes effective... that's when they bring in the spin kings like warne...

any thoughts...? come on mozz, come out of hiding and tell us how great you are and how crap we are...
proginoskes
24-Nov-06, 15:47

you know you can estmate the ambient air temperature by how often a cricket chirps every minute . . .
pawntificator
24-Nov-06, 16:11

The chirp
of a cricket is caused by the friction between its two back legs as it rubs them briskly together.
tugger
24-Nov-06, 16:29

trust the yanks to take the piss... not fast enough for you guys, huh? harder better faster stronger... see, us english like to have a lazy game where we just run every now and then... in fact, sometimes a player deliberately doesn't whack it as he's got a nice hot cuppa and some toast next to the stumps and doesn't want to have to go to the other ones...

ok, the truth is, i only like cricket when it's the ashes, as it's the only time we get a decent bit of competition with the aussies, although we've improved (and got crap again) at rugby, and they seem to getting near the "alright" tag at football... but the ashes will never lose its appeal, since the english and the aussies have, as far as cricket is concerned, found the balance between genuine competition and will to win with gentlemanship and mutual respect... and the cricket supporters are great too... i never thought i'd see the day england fans were chanting shane warne's name, but it happened at the last ashes, as an ackowledgement of a legend, all be it one we love to hate...

it's more than just twatting a ball with a bat a running...

now, come on england, start to show some desire... beat those exiled convicts...
qiwi
24-Nov-06, 20:41

Tugger....
Hey...steady on, we play cricket here as well you know.....
b.t.w. does the Ashes coverage you get over there come with the Aussie commentators.....?? Unbelievably biased comments.... when that little jerk Brett Lee manages to lay bat on ball they carry on as though he was the greatest batsman in the history of cricket rather than an average bowler who fantasises about being an all-rounder.... In saying that Glen McGrath really is a great bowler....
p.s. Sorry Mozz, Australian cricket is a bit of a sensitive issue with us Kiwi's what with the under-arm incident and Dyer the Liar e.t.c.
p.p.s Apologies for Billy Bowden....
mozz
24-Nov-06, 23:32

Well all is well, or all is lost, depending on your point of view. I will refrain from gloating at this stage as this is just how the last series started.

Suffice it to say though that we will stop Glen McGrath from treading on balls so he will be dangerously fit for the entire series.

England only go 155 in the first innings, Australia at stumps on day three are 1/181 with England not even really looking like taking a wicket.

Why are we not forcing the follow on? Simple, the powers that be want the game to go into the fifth day to maximise revenue. Given a choice, Ricky Ponting would have battefd again for 10-15 overs to give the bolwers a rest and then bowl them out before the end of day 4.
qiwi
25-Nov-06, 00:04

Mozz....
Hey.... in this particular case a bit of gloating could be forgiven.... man, what a thumping.
I must say I feel for Freddy Flintoff. He is a rare individual in modern day cricket. A gentleman who plays the game the way it should be played, no cockiness, no sledging and total respect towards his opponents....
Unfortunately this does not win games and it has to be said the English side appear to be totally outclassed in this encounter....
mozz
25-Nov-06, 01:58

I agree qiwi. I'm just feeling full of the milk of human kindness at the moment. My life is very good right now. I'm sure I'll get over it (the generosity, not the life is good bit).

I think having the captaincy may be a bit too much for freddy. It would be a shame to see such a good cricketer brought down by too much responsibility. Unfortunately I'm not sure that they have anyone else able to carry the load. Today's commentary team summed things up well I think.

They commented on the fact that Australia has the problem of deciding who to put in, they have a number of players clammouring for selection whereas England is looking for options, they have no one beating down the door for a spot.
leo_london
25-Nov-06, 03:17

mozz..." Why are we not forcing the follow on? Simple, the powers that be want the game to go into the fifth day to maximise revenue. Given a choice, Ricky Ponting would have battefd again for 10-15 overs to give the bolwers a rest and then bowl them out before the end of day 4.

That sounds spot on to me. Plus of course the opportunity to rub salt into the English wound for a few more hours.  
The bookies odds for a whitewash ( 5-0 ) are down to 3-1, with 4-0 coming in second favourite at 100-30.
It could be an embarrassing couple of months for us Brits...I vote we delete this thread and talk about something else.  
tugger
25-Nov-06, 04:26

qiwi... haven't had chance to see any of the coverage yet, i've been following what i can online, but it's going on through the night, and i'm working a shed load this week... but i doubt we'd get the biased aussie commentators... we'll get the biased british commentators instead...

mozz... i can't believe you guys didn't make us follow on... i'd like to think you'll end up regretting it, but i can't see how we can hold on for two whole days... how likely is it you'll get rain in brisbaine at this time of year...?

leo... i don't think it'll be a 5-0 whitewash... i'd like to think we're capable of winning at least one... we're not a bad cricket side at the moment, just playing bad...
leo_london
25-Nov-06, 05:46

tugger.." how likely is it you'll get rain in brisbaine at this time of year...? "

No chance, but you could try the kidderminster rain dance, or call in Uri Geller.

The commentators last night were Atherton, Holding ( I think ) and " bumble "...David Lloyd.
No, I dont think it will be a whitewash either. Harmison cannot bowl as badly as that again...can he ? Plus, this Brisbane wicket was made for McGrath, he wont find others quite so inviting...extra bounce, cracking up etc.
mozz
25-Nov-06, 12:49

tugger, any rain in brisbane at this time of year will be a sudden down poor around 4 in the afternoon. Will most likely disrupt play for about an hour at most. No real impact on the game.
proginoskes
25-Nov-06, 13:21

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long, with large beady eyes and shovel-like forelimbs highly developed for burrowing and swimming. They
are also equipped with wings, and the ability to fly. The adult mole cricket may fly as far as 8 kilometers
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Mole crickets are omnivores, feeding on grubs, worms, roots, and grasses. Common predators of mole
crickets include birds, rats, skunk, armadillos, raccoon and foxes.
Mole crickets are relatively common, but because they are nocturnal and spend nearly all their lives
underground in extensive tunnel systems, they are rarely seen. They inhabit agricultural fields, lawns, golf
courses and pawn shops. Five out of the seven species present in North America are immigrants from
Europe, Asia, and South America, and are commonly considered pests. In Asia, however, they are
sometimes used as food (fried), and are considered quite delicious.
Nonetheless, in certain parts of the globe, mole cricket numbers are declining due to soil erosion and
habitat destruction.

en.wikipedia.org" target="_blank">-> en.wikipedia.org
tugger
25-Nov-06, 15:52

uri geller...? i don't want to bend spoons with my mind...!

but the kidderminster raindance (aka walking) seems to work a treat...

australia 2nd innings... 181-1... for crying out loud... when did we turn this crap...?

and to think i thought we were evenly matched...

qiwi
25-Nov-06, 21:14

Dont want to labour the point......
....but from what I have seen today I see no reason to change my assessment of Brett Lee....
His style of play is too one dimensional for the 5 day form of the game....
bowling short-pitched deliveries serves some purpose in a one-dayer in that it can slow the run rate but in a test, especially the one in progress now, it is nonsense..... I am sure the English batsmen would be happy for Lee to bowl bouncers until the cows come home....
Mind you it is entertaining.... every time the batsman connects with one of his short-pitched deliveries his eyes light up..... and then when the ball cracks into the fence he looks like he is about to burst into tears.
qiwi
25-Nov-06, 22:07

Howzat??
I realise the English players are pushing it up hill with a pointed stick in this test..... but Collingwood and Pietersen are on fire at the moment..... some sublime batting from both of them.....
Lee, understandably has been taken out of the attack.... but now Warne is getting a caning and even McGrath is looking a bit bedazzled..... hey, it probably wont last but by it is entertaining as hell!!!!
Pietersen's half century contained 10 4's and at the moment Collingwood is on 92 with a ton looking a certainty.....
qiwi
25-Nov-06, 22:37

Oooops...
Collingwood out for 96..... McGrath has been taken out of the attack.... he was looking tired... Brett Lee is back into the attack.... his very first ball to Flintoff smacked into the fence....
mozz
26-Nov-06, 18:11

Well Petersen, with a rush of blood to the head gets out on 92 and it's all over by lunch. Your storms were due today too tugger.

Well, the poms have a two day nothing game to get ready for Adelaide on Thursday.

Mybe ponting will miss it with a dud back and maybe Glenn McGrath will miss it with a bruised heel. Either way it won't matter if the english batsmen do not improve their shot selection.
qiwi
26-Nov-06, 20:57

Mozz....
Congratulations on a convincing win..... hey.... hope you dont mind me giving Ponting and the boys a bit of stick... normally it would be the Poms I'd be putting the boot into but since my great grandparents came from Yorkshire I am rooting for Freddy this time....  
proginoskes
26-Nov-06, 20:58

i've been very briefly trying to follow this conversation and I'm not convinced anyone here is speaking in
English . . .
mozz
26-Nov-06, 21:45

Sorry JD we are speaking in english. It's american we are not speaking in.

qiwi, do feel free to put the boot in. Instead of getting upset, I'll just go look at the international ratings.
pawntificator
26-Nov-06, 23:27

I hear
they have figured out how to turn the ashes into diamonds. That is neat.
qiwi
27-Nov-06, 01:57

Mozz.....
My brother is married to an Australian and has been living over there for so long I have forgotten exactly what year he went... but I know it was over 20 years ago....
I am hoping to come over for a visit early next year....
mozz
27-Nov-06, 02:58

Where abouts does your brother live?
tugger
27-Nov-06, 05:34

begrudgingly, i must congratulate the convicts... i just hope we pull our fingers out for the next test... we cannot afford to lose that, or it's too much to keep hold of the ashes... and i don't want us to come home with them after a drawn series... so an england win is vital...

i hope ponting and mcgrath are fit, it's no good us winning and australia having an exuse... we want an full strength series so we can gloat with pride when we win...!
jaymar
27-Nov-06, 12:23

Don't..
..worry too much about excuses tugger. If it hadn't been for McGrath falling over the ball in England we might not have won them in the first place. I hope he breaks his leg jumping for joy over this win. I don't care how we win as long as we keep the ashes.

Having said that we look to be in for a long hard summer in oz. Freddie can't do it all on his own and the selectors have already shown how confident they are (not) by dropping Monty for the first test. It's going to be an uphill struggle all the way.

Now how are Mcgraths celebrations going?
soulcrates
27-Nov-06, 13:46

Not to sound too American, but
why do they call it "Cricket"? We have crickets here in America, and there is no similarity between the two, as far as I can tell.
qiwi
27-Nov-06, 18:38

why do they call it Cricket....???
Now that is a b****y good question.....
qiwi
27-Nov-06, 23:38

Mozz...
My brother and his wife are living in Queensland at the moment. A place called Labrador somewhere on the Gold Coast I believe.... they have moved around a bit... started out in a place called Noosa Heads....
tugger
28-Nov-06, 08:06

i have a question... why do they call those stupid grasshopper things crickets...? they look nothing like a couple of chaps with bats, one running with a ball in his hand and another ten in strategic positions on a field...

and not to sound too english, but why do you americans call your game of throwball football...? are you even allowed to kick the ball in that game...?
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