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chilliman64
03-Feb-14, 11:49
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I admit that after the last few days of events i was seriously thinking of leaving GK..for good,but now that i have settled down Triton and The Alternative Chess Club is here to stay.
It doesn't need to be the club on the top of the ladder,just a place for talk and some fun.
Thanx to you all.
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the success of a club isn't just measured in the number of members or how active the forum is. if the members are happy and visit often then that is what matters. often I visit the club and just read, I don't always post. there is plenty of room for all types of clubs on gk.
I love this club
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Thank you for that feed back...
Just don't want every ones hard work to go down the drain.
I would like to see this club succeed and not have GK giving warnings...
The only warning that we got was because of some one else and they are no longer in this club nor will they ever be.
I am not going to upset the apple cart...i will sit here and watch...in the silence.
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 @bears1: |
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Who knows...i suppose all we can do is go with the flow!
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Yep. That's the saying. And, in fact, that is one way to manage anger. That's a very good thing to remember. Interestingly enough, in terms of activity, I feel the same way that you do. While not angry at all, one time, I was a little upset do to inactivity, but I realize that this kind of thing had only lasted one or two days. And, now, I also know that, just like in chess, there's always more to a story then meets the eye. The reason that people are inactive, and the main thing that would restrict anyone, even me, is the busy work schedule. But, work always comes first. The other thing, people need a good nights sleep so there will be well rested, and get to work on time. So, between those two things, and occasionally, shoveling snow, that naturally, sets limits on what you can do there. But, it's what you call, "a chain of events", where one thing leads to another. So, not being able to online for, sometimes, an entire day, is, in my mind, the natural thing that would limit people's activities, and essentially from the posts into the club forum. But, to keep it all in stride, when people are completely off, that's when the fun really begins.
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Now that you said that the company that i work for sent all the CSM's to an anger management course 2 months ago.
cost them 700 dollars each..the laugh is i am now doing a relieving CSM for the company as my new role and then permanent...i think they missed me...
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chilliman64
07-Feb-14, 04:31
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I think you're right CM. Repressed emotions will eventually leak out, but I thought that anger management is to control misdirected anger. e.g. you´re mad at your wife because of something she said and you end up being short-tempered, mean, aggressive with your customers. I think some of it is not blaming others for "making" you feel a certain way (scapegoating). At work did a seminar called "Cognitive Coaching" and it talked about things like that.
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saintinsanity
07-Feb-14, 11:44
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I was a psych orderly for 7 years
I still can't explain why people do what they do, nor am I very good at convincing them to do otherwise. Some people are just really angry.
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saintinsanity
07-Feb-14, 11:44
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I'm guessing it's because
sometimes life really sucks and isn't fair, but what do I know?
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Interestingly Enough
I felt that studying the 10 basic steps on managing anger was extremely important, and now I'm glad that I did this. About 6 or 7 years ago, I got extremely angry and did something far worse then the people who are no longer in this club did. This didn't happen on GK or on the computer. Instead, it occurred with my parents, and yes, pawntificator asked a very good question in a different thread. That is, if one of those former members held a grudge. As it turns out, at one point, I held a grudge against my immediate family for about 6 years, over something very small. As a result, not only did I take things way too far by making these kinds of threats, but it caused me to act out on it. And, by doing so, I actually attempted Grand Theft Auto, believe it or not. However, I did not get away with it. I was caught in the attempt and payed a very hefty price, lost privileges, got grounded and then some. Later on, we made up, and there was a lot of apologizing and forgiving one another. Shortly after that, I, voluntarily because no one told me to do it just decided on my own, I went online for an anger management program and got the 10 basic steps. Then I looked and some of the main symptoms of anger including: indirect hostility, verbal hostility, and irritability. But, there are other things, as well. And, I also got advice on how to handle it, like talking to pets or writing personal notes; talking to friends on how you feel, taking a breath, taking a walk, letting the mind rest, and thinking about what led to the anger. There are, however, other things, as well. For instance, there was one thing which never got mentioned there, but catzlaw said it in the club captain forum, before that thread got locked and then deleted. That is, "Life is too short to hold grudges."
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The good news is that my job has very similar rules. If you're angry, one has to keep it to him or herself. That's because company policy states that all employees have to get along with one another because arguing, and even, yelling at one another is not good for business. PS, I have to add that customers really notice when there is a verbal feud with one another.
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Talk about going over board or attacking another player, I found something like this. In a recent thread which got deleted, and then another thread to replace that one called, "Top 10's", chilliman accurately pointed out as per GK rules, "You may not use the forums, or another player, to get around someone's ignore list. I.e. you may not post a message in the forums with the sole purpose of addressing the player who placed you on their ignore list, or ask someone else to contact them on your behalf. You may not help another player get around someone else's ignore list." One time, I did something similar after being removed from a club in a PM, but only to get back in a club because I certainly did not care about ignores. But, little did I know, however, until then that you couldn't join a club if you were on the founder's ignore list. So, in that, I went a little too far. But, it's better then what I saw today, where, although I really like this person due to his effort and participation, he talked about how upset he was that someone was on his ignore in this club's forum, which is the reason that it got deleted today. Listen, we all have bad moments, and there are things that enrage, as you might notice from my previous post. But, let's all remember one thing which is why, at one point, I went overboard with those moderations. As bears1 pointed out it's important to follow GK rules. And, protesting in a public forum about being on someone's ignore list is basically the equivalent to attacking another member in that it's a violation of the community standards of GK. The moral to this is that more often then not, if something upsets us, it's better to just keep it to ourselves and not say anything. While this is difficult to do, it's extremely important to remember.
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A point of order here;
No Mod or Founder should have anyone who is in their club on 'ignore'. You may have to communicate with that person (or that person with you) in private or public while conduction club business. If it's bad enough that there can be no private communication between the parties, that 'ignored' person should not be in the club or the Mod should not be a Mod.
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@thumper
I absolutely agree with this assessment. As noted in the ignore list thread, there is one person on my list. Now, thank goodness that he hasn't applied to join this club. But, if he ever did, I would decline his application right away because if you're a member, but are on a mod's list, what happens? Well, there's a lot of arguing, and sometimes, even attacking of one another. This can certainly ruin the fun and enjoyment of a club, and our club is about just that. So, in short, it makes perfect sense then not to have someone in a club, if the mod ignores you.
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And
While I can't discuss it in this thread, as per GK's rules, I also now understand what you're saying and what's going on.
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I disagree. if I want to ignore someone then I will. all my communications with pawntificator in the club forums were polite and cordial and from a club point of view that is all that matters. I didn't admit him to TACC and there is no onus on me to communicate with anyone I don't want to.
if I need to communicate with someone on my ignore list then I can 'un-ignore' them for the purposes of communicating if I wanted to. I don't believe there are any other TACC or MMMC members on my ignore list - I don't do it to everyone, just those that deserve it.
I removed him from this club (and another one that I am a mod of) because he repeatedly broke the rules - deliberately broke the rules in an effort to agitate and cause trouble. he has met this fate in other clubs too, not just the ones I moderate in.
mr thumper seems to me that you're directly addressing me with your post. I'm sure that if you want to moderate in this club that all you would have to do is ask bears1 for a chance to demonstrate your prowess. I for one will say I'm no expert and willing to learn from a master. you don't know the full story about pawntificator, his continual rule breaches and the pm's and multiple applications he made to rejoin both clubs despite me repeatedly asking him not to so please I respectfully ask that you don't question my attitude/motivation/mod-status in the public forum. I'm more than happy to discuss with you via pm, it's ok, you're not on my ignore list. if you're not having a shot I apologise, it just seems like you are aiming at me because I am a mod and I had a member on ignore so logic dictates your post refers to me.
Also, if a founder has someone on ignore than they cannot apply to join that club. if the founder has a current member on ignore then they should be removed from the club. as I was not the only mod in TACC I did not feel the need to remove him from the club prematurely, better to give him the rope and let him do the rest which is what happened.
jk I again applaud your understanding of gk rules and I know you and I have discussed that it is not always simple when it comes to interpreting and enforcing someone elses rules. rule 13 is pretty clear about what is acceptable and what isn't.
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Chilli
I've 'known' Pawn since '02 when he joined GK. He has a sordid and checkered past; He's irreverent, cheeky and brash and has been kicked out of all the respectable clubs and most of the less than respectable ones too.
My comment to JK was just a general heads up about being able to communicate with club members without violating GK policies and procedures, nothing against any specific person. If I had meant to give you any guff, you would not have had to question if I was. Peace big fella.
Bear wouldn't want me as a mod, this place has gotten too respectable.
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chilliman64
11-Mar-14, 04:09
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@thumper:
I understand what you're saying, but I can't completely agree with you. "I've 'known' Pawn since '02 when he joined GK. He has a sordid and checkered past; He's irreverent, cheeky and brash and has been kicked out of all the respectable clubs and most of the less than respectable ones too." I've only known him since I rejoined this club and became a mod. The thing is, however,, he's still a member, and I believe, a well respected one of one of the most successful clubs on GK, now even more active then the Elite Club used to be. This club is called, "Walking the Walk and Learning How to Run" by jstevens1. And, I briefly saw one of his threads which was amazingly good. Plus, in this particular club, there was a thread I created before copying and pasting into my club, as noted earlier. It was the Consultation thread, where you go over various positions of past games and quizzes. Of everyone, pawntificator showed, by far, the most effort and motivation, where you can tell that he really cared and, promoted chess. Now, in my club called Chess Coaches and Mentors he continued to do an amazing job with answering questions and even getting them right, and proved that he really cared about answers. And, he did not cause trouble or violate any of the community standards on GK. As a result of his effort, he helped my club be successful and shape it to become what it's really meant for, helping players to improve. Hopefully, it'll continue to improve and become what it's meant. But, because of what I noted earlier I promoted him into a moderator because even though the club is quiet as of the moment, we were, about a week ago, very active. So far, although I might sound ridiculous and unrealistic, I actually have a lot of respect of him.
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Jkarp
My post was mostly tongue-in-cheek. I was just ribbing Pawn a bit... but... You should have seen him 'back in the day'. A real rapscallion. If I remember correctly, I may have even kicked him out of a club at one time.
For my personality type, he takes a bit of getting use to but I've came to the conclusion over the years that he's OK. We actually have a lot in common.
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baddeeds
04-Apr-14, 23:28
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Deleted by baddeeds on 05-Apr-14, 06:10.
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hey jk - you don't have to explain your every action. do what is necessary.
abuse and villification have no place on gk. neither do bullying or discrimination of any type. sometimes for the good of the whole you have to cut off the extremity, it's not pleasant, it's necessary.
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You will have noticed that i stay out of these topics...all i can say that explanations are really not necessary..we try and do what we can.
MrM is a good man really and i know he goes of the handle as i have so many times in my life and at work...It goes with the territory..we try to protect our own and in this case it is the team and the club and all those that are within it.
I have removed Mrm from my ignore list...but it is up to him to revamp his attitude to others that he has lashed out and to those that he wishes to attack.
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Sorry..
Due to personal issues and they are coming in thick and fast i am asking G.K.if we can transfer the club to some Nome else...
I think i know the answer but i hope that so,e one has some compassion.
It also means that team Triton will need a new captain...having said that my co captain will be given first preference but dbf1 has been asked.
There is to be no transfer to another club allowed nor merger and also you will need to treat the team with respect and dignity...and also do not change the name or history of the one that was the inspiration of the team My dog...If at any time i choose to start a team up again..then i have the sole right to take the team name back and you then and only then will be allowed to change the name...and we will then talk about that at the time...The name Triton is mine....
Anyone may apply...
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chilliman64
05-Apr-14, 04:41
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04:52
[ delete ]
I got asked the reason...
Hear it is
My favorite nephew lost his baby yesterday at birth...i have parents now 91 and 86 that i am running around with my sister who is older that me...my back is stuffed as my feet and i am at the end of it.
I love the team and the club but i cannot dedicate to any of it...
What else can i do??
Knowing the answer thought you may want an answer...there it is...Sorry guys i enjoyed it....maybe one day.This club will
cheers Fred
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I agree with you, chilliman. There's no need to belabor, too much, on any fact or explain everything.
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